Eyes opened, lips closed

Days double in youth

and half when old

and now I’m in between

the constancy of then and then,

a scatter of twenty odd years

doing a scatter of twenty odd things

for a scattering of twenty odd reasons,

hoping for days to stop altogether

so I can rest

or live

and not be afraid of losing either

in the worry of how my youth influenced my decisions

or how the decisions will influence me

when I’m old with no more days

except those I can remember and then forget

*

I love my man

the woman says

which I do not doubt

for she is looking

everywhere for him –

even now

as we kiss

her eyes are opened

while her lips are

closed

*

She is the love of my life

but I am starting to

wonder if I

love my life

while being with her

because

my life of love

ends and starts with her

and where do I fit in,

besides beside her?