hotmail

my email is slowly estranging itself from me

with subscriptions to porn hub and other dead philosophers

who once fed on boys that could’ve resembled gods in their

failure to trust adults like me clicking through flaps of flesh

that make our our ours because maybe she’ll want to try

this needing after retiring or coming to bed that is too hard anyways

two bodies who have forgotten to feel what it means to not

to sit with the loneliness of a lobotomy and thoughts that dream

of doing more than thinking like an animal who knows the newest ipad

isn’t worth the green but neither is the barking beast the snake

with a new tie and suit and wife and that ipad now from the email offers that

pour more generously and strangely and forgetfully thus pouring more

till they pool into a night that ruins each day with each night that repeats the same

that is behind the bloodied boys and the greedy gaps and their whispering ways to find it always it

forever it even when it isn’t there in all of it including you me them us

purge the inbox delete the history become ascended