michael, mark, jason, justin, jordan, brandon, alex, reid, marco, adrian, joel, garret, andrew, thomas, douglas, larson, angelo, eric, adam, daniel, zach, emilio, peter, rick, and michael again

i sometimes think

of my childhood friends

as grown as i

and i wonder if they wonder

if they’re happy

or if i am

and i realize that

if they are smiling

those toothless-turned-braces-turned-bit-lip-red smiles

that makes me smile too

and if they aren’t in some way

perhaps because of those same teeth

that didn’t grow as they were supposed to

but instead jutted like stars too close

to another galaxy that ate them up

with all the flash and spots

that prepubescence can bring

in its baby calcium

its adult fillings

and its blood always

then maybe i can make them happy

by starting us off

with gums that pour red

each time i brush them

because of a childhood

where i did not think much

but only did

alongside my childhood friends

*

i write what i feel

so you feel what i write

and with the feelers of hands

and words that have felt me

sometimes peculiarly

because they did not belong to my tongue

but swam like fish in a stream

that can only grow with wear

i hope you float and feel nothing

but ease