when hen new h

when there is nothing left

you will be

when all has gone

you still are

and when there is no more there there

you remain yours

and not theirs

*

i understand

it all now

because unknown

and alone

i realize

i tried to give you

what i could not give myself

and what i never understood

to be in me

*

you weren’t there

when i needed

but still

you do not die

*

now that you’re gone

i am back

with what brought me

to you

the feeling that

i belong

to myself

*

is there any healing

or just pain heeling

a slow numbness

to the mess around

to the questions that sharpen

and eventually

settle themselves into answers

uneasy like a cut

that does not know it isn’t a mouth

and it isn’t supposed to sing

with life